Does He Love Me? 22 Ways Men Show They Care
For many people in new relationships, the big question can be whether their feelings are reciprocated - whether the guy they are dating is feeling the same way that they are, or whether they see the connection as more short term and not going anywhere. To further complicate things, often it isn’t until a relationship is really established that these kinds of deep conversations are had - at the beginning, both people might prefer to keep it light - meaning we might not know how the other person is feeling about things until it is too late. That said, there are some great signs that the guy you’re seeing is feeling something deeper for you, and is starting to see a future with you - and is actively making an effort to make your life more enjoyable with their actions.
Here are some tell-tale signs this might be happening:
1. He Says It - The most obvious one of all! For some guys, often the more emotionally open ones, they may come right out and say ‘I love you’ or something to that effect. This can be a challenge for many males to express, though, for whatever reason, so don’t panic if it doesn’t get articulated until much later on - luckily there are many other ways to figure out how he might be feeling about you.
2.Making plans for the future - Future plans are a good indicator that he is starting to consider you a part of his life in the longer term. This might look like discussing holiday plans a few months down the track, or having deeper discussions about what kind of life you might want a few years down the track, how you might raise kids, and the values you might have around family and career.
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3.Acts of Service - For many males, practical help is a way of showing care and support - and can often be a lot more straightforward than a love poem or a romantic dinner. This might look like helping to fix your car, driving you to and from work, helping with chores or providing help to family members. Even if they don’t seem too romantic, acts of service are fundamental signs that he is invested in our wellbeing and wants to help us how they can.
4.Sharing their thoughts - Opening up about things that are bothering them may be a sign that he is starting to trust you and is interested in your input. It is good to remember that for many males this can take a while, but can be a great step towards understanding each other better and becoming closer.
5.Asking your advice - If he asks for your advice about a personal matter, this indicates that they value your opinion and feel comfortable being vulnerable in not knowing something. Even if they don’t end up taking it, this interaction is a positive one as it can strengthen that sense of reciprocity and communication.
6.Helping out around the house - Again, this may not be the most romantic thing in the world, but if he makes an effort to help out with chores when they are over, it is a sign that they are wanting to invest time and effort in it - that, or they just have excellent manners. Either way, it is a win!
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7.Remembering important dates - This may differ according to the person and their level of organisation, but if he remembers important things like birthdays, anniversaries or other dates you’ve mentioned, it is likely that that they are paying attention to these for a reason - and are investing time in making sure they acknowledge them.
8.Attends Family Events - This may come as a surprise, but family events can be a bit of a drag if they aren’t your family - if he is keen to attend family events, it is a good sign that they are invested in building relationships with the people who are important in your life.
9.Asks about friends - If he remembers things that are going on in your friends’ lives, or asks after them, this is another sign that he is keen to invest time and effort into building up these relationships with people who are close to you - and has a genuine interest in what is happening in their lives, since they are important people in your life.
10.Puts down his phone - Unfortunately, with phones being the source of entertainment and connection, we can find ourselves glued to our devices even during what is meant to be quality time. If he deliberately puts his phone away when interacting with you (whether at dinner, during dates, when hanging out), it shows that he is making an effort to to focus and be present with you.
11.Checks with you for plans - If he checks in with you when making plans for the weekend or the week ahead, it shows that they are taking you into consideration with their plans - and considering what you might want to do, as well as when you’re available.
12.Has your favourite things - If you visit his house and he has tidied up and has your favourite drinks, or favourite snacks, this is a strong sign that he is taking your needs into consideration and hoping to make his place somewhere you’ll want to be. Again, it is about consideration and awareness of what your preferences and needs are.
13.Sets aside quality time - As busy as we are these days, if he makes an effort to set aside quality time for the two of you to spend together, this is a good sign that he is interested in building up and strengthening the relationship. Quality time helps us to get to know each other better since we’re focused on each other - and can be a good opportunity to discuss plans for the future and how the relationship is going.
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14.Considers your feelings - A major sign that he cares is if they take care with your feelings - whether this is being tactful with how they phrase something, diverting conversation away from difficult topics, or comforting you when upset. It also shows empathy, and that your discomfort or sadness is something that impacts him.
15.Learns from mistakes - Another helpful sign is if he changes his behavior in response to something you’ve said, or a conflict you’ve had - meaning he’s listened to your concerns and has decided to do things differently next time - in order to reduce conflict and keep things moving smoothly between the two of you.
16.Tries to communicate - Communication is hard - especially in new relationships! If he is making an effort to have those important conversations and resolve issues maturely, it is a sign that he is willing to go the extra mile for the relationship - even if that means having some serious talks.
17.Stays in Touch - If he is in touch with you regularly and keeps you posted about his day and plans, this is a sign that he is thinking of you during the day and also is investing time and effort in staying connected, even in busy times.
18.Talks about you to others - Talking to his friends and family about you and your life shows that he wants the people in his life to know all about you - whether this is bragging about your work or achievements, or just sharing some stories of fun times you’ve had together.
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19.Keeps mementoes - As much as they would hate to admit it, many guys are incredibly sentimental, and can often keep things like notes or mementoes of dates or memories - if he has these around his house, it is a good sign that they are there to remind him of you and of the connection you share.
20.Has your back - If he is in your corner during a dispute or conflict, it shows that he is emotionally invested and there to support you - a great sign that he is in it for the long haul.
21.Tells you the truth - If he is making an effort to be direct and truthful with you, even if it is not something you necessarily want to hear, this is a good sign that he wants to establish trust and honesty with you - and is aware that lying might jeopardize the relationship.
22. Works to create memories - If he is taking the time to make certain things special (eg. date night, meals, holidays), it is a clear sign that he is investing in the relationship - putting in time and effort to build up the connection and appreciation between the two of you. This is a powerful sign that he cares for you and sees the value of a future together.
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