Guest-Star In your partner's Fantasies
Yep, this one is about sex. More specifically, the type of sex that often gets locked away in the parts of our brain reserved for shame. With that being said, we're here to tell you it might be time to unlock those instincts and shed them of their stigmas. To express the truths of our sexual desires. To understand that it's okay to get a little bit - shall we say - weird.
Are you feeling loose yet? Good.
Get Curious The deeper we find ourselves in a long-term relationship, the more likely it is that our initial patterns of sex will start to lose their novelty. Says author and sex expert Celeste Hirschman, “One way that we help a lot of couples create lasting sexual connection is having a deeper conversation and learning about what really turns each of them on, not just physically but psychologically. For instance, getting curious about whether your lover wants romance or dominance and submission, and what they really want to feel from you during sex is so important. When each person in the couple is fully curious about the other’s turn-ons and wants to give them generously (within their personal boundaries, of course!), couples’ sex lives really thrive. We call this guest-starring in each other’s ‘hottest sexual movies.’ This way everyone gets to have the sex they like the most, taking turns or bridging if the desires are different."
Whether it's dialogue or physical cues, exploring a new world of sexual desires is about being honest and willing.
This is where we start dipping into the fantasy element. Allowing yourself to become vulnerable enough with your partner to play out different realities helps reinvigorate your collective curiosity while connecting on a level you didn't even consider possible. But before you start researching "hot plumber" costumes, how do you get the conversation going?
There answer is: There is no right way. Whether it's dialogue or physical cues, exploring a new world of sexual desires is about being honest and willing. If a "I've never talked about this and I'm really nervous" is your speed, let it out. If you want to show up in a doorway and ask your partner if they's "ready for their room service," you're still not wrong. The key is to get past the awkwardness and understand that you're experimenting, together.